Well, you have to hand it to us, we dream big. Which is a nice way of saying we have a perpetual habit of biting off way more than we can chew. We decided to build a chicken coop ourselves. My carpentry experience is limited to a couple of birdhouses and birds totally ignored them. Don has built decks and finished a basement and has a basic idea of what end of the hammer to hold, so he's way ahead of me. We decided to make it 16 ft by 16 ft, enough room to house the chickens over winter and to have the rabbits in a separate indoor colony setting, something I always wanted to do. Every time we talked about the coop, it always came up how small it was going to be. In fact, a few times I mentioned it being so small, shouldn't be that hard to do.
It fell to me to plot where the chicken coop would go and to get the four corners level and square. Everything I've read says it has to be level and square or you're hooped before you start. I went out bright and early Monday, figuring I'd do what everyone suggested to do and plot it using stakes and string. I figured it would take me a couple of hours. I was pretty impressed with myself because I thought of tying elastics to the string ends making the string nice and tight. Well, it took more than two hours but I did do it. Fat lot of good it did me. The foundation is deck blocks sitting on patio stones. To put the stone where it needs to go, I have to take out the stake thus loosing my perfect square. I'm hooped.
Tuesday, I start putting the stones down as close to center of the hole the stake made. The ground's not level; of course so some of the stones are going to have to be dug down into the ground a bit. I decide to start with the stones on the lowest part of the ground so I'll know how deep to dig the holes on the higher parts. It took me all day to get those four patio stones and deck blocks square. All day, four stones. By Tuesday I thought the floor frame would be done. I couldn't believe it took me all day. But I'm square and level. I'm no longer hooped, just tired, sore and feeling like a walking smorgasbord for the mosquitoes
Wednesday, I start digging the holes for the four side and the center blocks. First two blocks, I repeatedly haul the stone in and out as I make the hole deeper then shallower then deeper, struggling to find that elusive bubble in the middle of the level. Then my brain finally gets out of first gear and I realize I could find how deep the hole should be by putting a board in the two end blocks and measuring from that into the hole. If I ever start a business, I won't be calling it "Brains'R'Us". The rest goes a lot faster. Don came out with all the lumber he cut to length and shaved - we bought rough lumber. He watched me struggle lifting a stone into a hole I just dug. Ever helpful, he suggested that perhaps instead of digging down I should have just built up the low end. Memo to the general public: When your spouse is sweaty, fed up, achy and frustrated, don't suggest they re-do three days work, especially when they're holding a four foot level in one hand and a mallet in the other. There is such a thing as justifiable homicide. I got to hand it to him though; with that kind of courage he should have been a fire fighter. I reminded myself that he was the love of my life, the father of my children and a really good guy. By the end of the day, the stones are level. They're not all in, but I'm getting there. So I'm not hooped, just homicidal.
Thursday morning, I go out and look at my square, level blocks. No floor, no framing, I thought the walls would be up by now. 16 ft by 16 ft never looked more like 100 by 100 to me. I swear it grew overnight. Where did I ever get the idea this was a small building? The Parliament buildings aren't this big. I start digging the holes for the last couple of blocks. Then I get the four boards that make the frame and put them in. I go in when the light fades, trying to figure out how I can have three perfect square, level sides and one way off. I'm hooped.
Friday morning I go out, Don is just hammering the last nail in the outside frame. He smiles at me and says, "This angle was off a bit so I fixed it, it was the middle block that was throwing everything out of whack." I smile back, immensely happy that he was the love of my life, the father of my children and a really good guy. By the end of the day, all the boards are in and nailed. The floor will be on tomorrow. Everyone says leveling and making everything square is the hardest part, after that it's much easier and faster. I hope so because the way I'm going now, by the time the coop is finished, the chicks will be laying eggs.
Writer's Note: While I use the first person in this rambling tale, I had a lot of help. Don helped dig some of the holes and the kids helped carry the 16 ft boards. P, teenage son moved a lot of sod that had to be dug out and T, teenage daughter nailed in all the boards on one side and some on the other for me.
